Stan Lee's Comikazee 2012, and my first Cosplay!

Le Sigh, a brief moment in which to sit and write.

This past weekend marked two rather wonderful events. Firstly, Saturday my son and I attended Stan Lee's Comikazee for the second year. This year, however, we did it in true geek style.In my first ever cosplay in public I strapped on my Han Solo holster and embodied the scruffy nerf herder while my own geek spawn straightened his tie and readied his sonic screwdriver as the tenth incarnation of Dr. Who.

When we arrived it was immediately evident that this was a much bigger deal this year, and with guests like Mark Hamill, Kevin Smith, Felicia Day and the cast of The Guild how could it not be.  Since this weekend there has been a lot of whine buzz over how things were handled, but my own experience was stellar.

We waited in line with friends and enjoyed the Cosplay all around, bouncing in and out of line to take pics with our favorites. 

With the Tardis front and center we made a Who stop photo opp and took many pictures of the many doctors.  The Expo this year was easily twice the size and twice as full, but the crowds didn't do much to dampen our enthusiasm. Top three things on my list for the day; attempt a pic with Mark Hamill...I was dressed as Han after all, and few photos would be more epic,  Visit friends and one of my favorite artists Mr. Angus Oblong, and attempt to meet and thank Felicia Day for being awesome.

We strolled the halls and spied a bat man, a hulk and a cat women, all out of character and still wonderfully awesome.

The new art at every turn had me wishing I had saved more pennies!  While I didn't get my photo opp with Mr. Hamill, I did get to lay eyes on him during the panel for the new movie Sushi Girls, which for me is pretty much just as good. Provided I keep off the diet coke, I will have that moment to cherish always.

Angus Oblong was in the house and I scored another print and had a lovely little chat with him.  I now have a lovely family skeleton portrait to don my walls.

After hearing how much everyone was charging for photo opps and autographs I became a bit sad that I would likely not get a chance to meet Felicia Day, however we ventured back to The Guild table later in the day and almost the entire cast was there ( Sandeep was not there) , and I could get pics with them for free!! I shook their hands and told them they were awesome ( which they totally were/are), as is my custom when meeting people I admire , and then I came to Felicia.

It was about half a second after I took her hand that I realized she was not only not into the hand shakes, but not into touching at all. As a bit of a germ freak, I totally understood and immediately felt awful for being that pushy fan. Since I was already falling over my tongue trying to explain how awesome she was to her, I didn't get a chance to apologies. So, Felicia Day, if you read this, I am really sorry I made you touch me. No irony, no joke, totally sorry.

Also, I totally need to give a shout out to Dot Com.  As we passed his booth I jokingly fake photo bombed someone getting a picture with him.  He turned his massive form " You better not photo bomb me"

" oh no, sir, I wouldn't do that"

Next thing I know he was shaking MY hand and asking my name and being just about one of the coolest people ever. I told him I enjoyed his work and looked forward to seeing more of him and he said " Nice to meet you, Tabitha" !!! It was pretty freaking awesome.  The day rounded out with an adorable game of Quiddich, a glance in my direction from the Mistress of Darkness herself, Elvira, the droids we were looking for and about a million more Doctor who photos.

Meanwhile, while I was busy geeking out to the extreme, my husband had taken our little girl to a local tattoo place to get her ears pierced....we weren't trusting some 17 year old with a gun with our little girls ears. Or, I guess I should say, ear since it turns out the initial shock and adrenalin rush from piercing the first one has put her off doing the second one. So, for now anyway, she is rocking the piratical single earring look.

More geek fun to come this weekend as my husband and I face off against challenging ingredients and our fellow Dumbledor's Army brethren in Wizards Chef! Lastly, don't be fergetting this day be talk like a pyrate day.

From one frustrated human to another.

Watching a series on History channel last night with my husband about the geological history of our planet...yes, I watch these for fun.  Since I rarely can do one thing at a time I was catching up on BBC news reports at the same time.  We get to the episode about Asteroids and commits falling to earth and they are talking about in pact craters and dust clouds and I start to think, While there is nothing one can do about a collision with an Earth sized object there IS a lot we can do about NOT blowing our selves to smithereens .

So, with all these thoughts mulling around in my brain I sat down to write this, an open letter to those feeling the need to attack our embassys and putting the innocent in danger. While it is addressed to them specifically, I think the tone and main idea could apply to all religious zealots...

Dearest Extremists,

What the Fuck?!? Do you not understand the morals of your own religion? Are you not aware that in the vast cosmos of the ( possibly) infinite there are far bigger issues than your offense?

I know, what does an atheist like me know about your offense? Well, allow me to enlighten you.  I have read your stories, along with the countless other stories of the world's religions on my own search for the truth.  What I found did, indeed, lay in the heavens.

This is my truth, and I feel it is the actual truth. We are here because rocks falling from space, coated in amino acids and the building blocks of life hit our planet at just the right time in its history, with just the right conditions for those blocks to assemble into the first signs of what would become the life on earth we now have all around us. That's it, that's the big answer.

You wonder how I can understand your offense? You quibble over stories long since proved false, you close your eyes to the truth many brilliant minds have sought out for you and you kill in the name of ancient tales.  Because of your small minds children are put at risk worldwide.

I am offended by all of you who think that your morals and your faith supersedes that facts of the physical world and that you feel the need to taint your children with your ideology and your totally lack of respect for the scientific truth of the world. As a human I am offended that in an age of reason and knowledge you choose ignorance.

I am offended, but I will not kill you for that offense, I will not force my ideas on your children no matter how much it offends me that you cast their minds into the darkness of old thinking, I will not limit your ability to pray to your god, to cover your woman or to hold your holy days.

I am not my government, as those in our embassies are not either. Those of you who recently rose up against your own leader should understand this, that not all of us are represented by one person.

If your faith means so much to you why do you not practice it as your prophet would have you? Do you not think he would be more offended by your violent actions that by a portrayal of him? From what I have studied he spoke quite highly of peace.

People are different, they will always be different and we must accept this if we hope to share this planet in peace. Let us be offended in peace. Let us post frustrated words on the internet to voice our feelings in peace. Let us espouse our feelings in blogs and leave innocent humans who have done nothing to us in PEACE. Let us be rubber, and not glue.

Be humble for you are made of Earth. Be noble for you are made of stars.

                                                                        --Syrian Proverb

And then the skies were empty.

I was sleeping when the phone rang. Annoyed at the call I answered as such
" What?"
It was my husband.
" turn on the t.v. "
" why am I turning on the t.v"
" Just do it," So I did. the tower shown in the summer blue sky as smoke poured out.  A plane had hit the tower. The pilot was probably drunk, we joked, how could he not see a building that tall. Wait, there's another... I had no words. We sat in stunned silence as we watched the second tower collide with the buildings, buildings that only a year before had marked for us our arrival on the East coast.  Was there some crazed person in charge at the air traffic control office that day. We still didn't know. Then the report came in about the plane hitting the pentagon. This was an attack. Someone was flying plans into things ON PURPOSE!
" Come home, now"
But he wouldn't, and I had to work. It was all the way in New York, he said, nothings going to happen here.
So I dressed, in black for the loss of life happening so far away about which I could do nothing BUT dress in black, my John Lennon tshirt preaching peace.
                 I was working at a head shop at the time and when I got there there was a line. Everyone wanted whip-its. If you're not keen on drug lingo, whip-its are tiny nitrice oxide charges that, when inhaled from a balloon, cause changes in your visual and physical perception. Apparently someone had discovered that if you did nitrice and watched the images they were showing, and would seemingly never stop showing, you could watch the glass roll like water. I sold over 30 boxes of them that day, and everyone brought me closer and closer to the brink. And then they fell. 3000 miles away people were dying and we stood; my co-worker, the staff from the bar next door, and a handful of customers, and we watched. The firefighters, doing their shopping across the street, were surrounded by other customers in the parking lot. We got word they were trying to get information out of them about what was really going on, but it was a good day and a half before any credible information came out, and not a bit of it was good news.
In those hours, between waking and finally getting home, all I wanted was my husband to be with me, to know that no matter what madness was going on in the world, I had him. And then I would think of the wives whose husbands worked THERE, the wives who would not come home that night, the mothers and fathers who were gone.
                  It wasn't until that night that the initial shock wore off and I could see that those bits of building falling were actually people, that those grey shapes moving away from the building were not part of the smoke, but yet more people running for their lives.
I had friends in the city, and all were safe. Ashley had had the day off after switching with a friend and so she wasn't at the Starbucks down the street from the towers that day, but watching at home like the rest of us. Blake had had the sense to leave work early after the first plane hit, leaving his 103 floor office in the second tower and finding himself half way home when he watched the second plane make its approach.
In the time that followed everyone was afraid. My mother in law urged us not to go to Disneyland because they might do something there, not to fly the following april as even the armed guards that lined the airport halls might not save us. But my husband and I agreed on this; We would not be afraid. They had taken that day to scare the world, to fill us with terror and while there will always be a great weight in my heart for those I watched die that day, they will not win. I had many choice words on the sudden burst of pseudo patriotism, on the way the Administration was using the loss of life to fuel their agenda, and the strange way the buildings fell, but on this day I think only of those who are not here, and those whose hearts are hallow in their absence.
Be you Democrat, Republican, or disenfranchised third party; You are an American, and that day we were as one. Let us grab hold of that feeling, that knowledge that we are all brothers and sister and cousins and never forget that lesson. Let their terror fill us with love and understanding for each other. Let us have peace.

To Boldly Go

In September, 1966 a show aired that would change the face of television and , eventually, the face of technological advancements world wide. Seems a bit far reaching for a campy sci-fi show, I know, but Star Trek , with is cardboard computers and strange aliens would open doors some didn't even know where there to open.

In a tumultuous time, when our streets and newspapers were full of hate and war, Gene Roddenberry, the creator of Star Trek, envisioned a future where our greatest enemies were far away in space. A future in which the people of this world had overcome their trivial biases, cleaned up our planet and moved forward in the intellectual pursuit of space exploration.  The crew of the Enterprise, while surely facing their share of alien foes, were one people, only human.  The first on screen bi racial kiss happened on the decks of the Enterprise.  A multi racial cast, where in the issue of race came up only through the eyes of the alien crew member Spock, who was ever pointing out the "flaws" of being human, gave inspiration to all Americans, not just the white male ones.

While avoiding the racial issues among their own crew, those on  board faced bigotry as it was through the galaxies,  pointing out the pointlessness of it all through characters with even less reason to hate each other.  A lot of people will only ever see a silly t.v show, but for those of us who really know, Star Trek has long been a stunning example for us all to follow.

Years after the original series had stopped bringing new episodes, as it still did remain on television, a new vision came forth. Into the even more distant future and holding onto the original ideals of the first series, Star Trek: The Next Generation, brought yet more hope.

Not only would humans create a peaceful society, they would bring that peace to even the most volitile of planets.  The Federation of Planets, like some stellar U.N., would help to bring waring planets together, they would banish those that wished harm on lesser beings, women would not only serve on ships, but captain them, they would instill faith and trust into even their youngest crew members because in this world anything is possible. In this future the blind can see and even a man made of latex and wire can feel and love. 

Every time I pick up my cell phone, I see a tricorder and communicator in one.  When I hear of advancements in invisibility technology, I think of those damn Romulans. Gene Roddenberry has returned to the stardust from whence he came, but he has left behind him a golden trail of inspiration. 

Star Trek has inspired the imagination of children, Scientists, engineers and developers and it is my greatest hope that it will continue to do so.

Perhaps if we could get politicians to be likewise inspired we might have hope, hope for a future in which we do boldly go, to seek out new worlds and new civilizations. Live long, and prosper. 

Zen and the art of surviving Motor Vehicle Madness

I was all decked out, sparkly jewelry in place, birthday gift at my side, cruising along the 118 minding my own business.  The road seemed especially bumpy, which wasn't far from the norm on the 118, which has always been a rather bumpy ride. So, I changed lanes to see if the fast lane was any better, but no it wasn't.  About ten seconds after I changed lanes I felt a KABLAMO on my rear end, I looked back there and there was a strip of something flying behind me, my car swerved, rocked on two wheels and really tried to get away like a bucking horse. FYI, apparently 80 IS a little fast.

 Now, I have been in accidents in the past and normally my heart explodes into my throat and my body buzzes with adrenalin. Oddly, that didn't happen.

In the past two years or so I have been working with myself to be more Zen about life. Instead of trying to control every detail and getting all stressed when things don't go as I think they should, I have recently been breathing deeply and moving on. After all, there really is very little we CAN control and the number one thing on that short list is how we react to the world around us. So, as I regained control of my car, flipped on my hazards and moved slowly across the five lanes, I was at once irritated I would likely be missing the party I was all dressed up for, considering what I was going to be doing in the next half hour ( mainly changing a tire and standing on the side of the freeway) , and proud of myself for regaining control of the car and NOT flipping over.

Seeing the mass damage my fucked up tire caused  in the blow out would normally have sent me into a panic, but my new found view let me breath deep and move right along. 

Nothing I can do about the bent metal at the moment.  Once I checked out the damage I called out to my support team, namely my husband  (who really couldn't do anything since I had our only car) and my brother.  Just as I was trying to remember  what the man at the dealership had told me about where my spare was four years ago, a man in a bright yellow vest appeared.  My first thought was that it was Cal Trans and I was busted for littering  the freeway with the broken pieces of my tire, but no, he was a member of an elite force of people with trucks whose job it is to rescue stranded people with busted ass tires.

  I had never heard of the Metro Freeway Patrol, a free ( sigh of relief) service that drives up and down the freeway helping stranded motorists. I informed him my brother was on the way, but he went straight to work helping me figuring out where the spare was, and  getting right down to business changing the tire. Being the kind of woman who likes to do for herself, I offered to help with the tire change a few time, even considering my nicer clothes, but he would have none of it. He finished up just as my brother arrived to be my safety escort home. 

I am still very proud of how calm I remained during the whole debacle, and how calm I still am considering the fact that I will likely be out a car until I win or inherit a large sum of money.

While I am not a religious person, the Zen philosophy of letting go that which we cannot control has given me a new, calmer, view on life. You should try it, it's pretty super. 

The Olympics, Curiosity and what it means to be human

My first real memory of the Olympics was watching the torch run past me. I didnt understand it really, other than the fact it had come very far and that it all had something to do with M&M's . Years later I would reach back into my own memory and be touched by the fact that I had seen with my own eyes a symbol of the games. As I grew and learned more about what the games represented, or what they should represent anyway, I loved them more and more. 

The idea that all the peoples of Earth could join together in weeks of sport, that representatives from warring nations could compete side by side in peace, it gave me hope. Heck, it still gives me hope today! This year, yet another Olympic mile stone was passed. For the first time in Olympic history there was a woman competing from every nation. In a time when it seems that even in this country the rights of woman are in retrograde, there walked in pony tails, head scarves and full of pride the woman of the world. And of course I cried like a wee baba. Some of these woman faced death threats, taunts of "Prostitute"  or "Whore", but still they walked with strength and pride giving hope to some little girl, who maybe doesn't understand the Olympics yet but will one day look back and know she was there!

Still riding the emotional wave of the games, I was also getting amped for the latest endeavor from our good friends at NASA. Being an avid fan of not only science fiction, but also of science fact, I have had my ear on this as long as they have been planning it. I jumped at the chance to send my kids names up with the rover in October of last year, and was totally bummed when the launce was delayed. But then it was happening, really and truly. I dragged the kids along with me to a seminar on the rover itself and the upcoming launce where we got to put hands on the material that would be used to land the rover and let me tell you, if you think it looked flimsy on film I am still amazed that stuff worked!  Then, when the time came, I sat in a dark, sleepy house on my lonesome and waited.  If this mission failed it would be a huge disappointment and a waste of ten years of hard work from NASA and JPL. And if it worked...

I had begun to doze when cheers of joy filled my head phones and the simple black and white image showed up on my monitor. I may as well have been there myself, I jumped up, clapped my hands, and cried . We, the human race, had done it again. We had reached out into the stars and succeeded.  

This past month I have been renewed with hope for this human race. While the world seems on the verge of erupting into some crazy socioeconomic cluster fuck there are still those striving ever to improve what we are, who we are, and what it means to be human.  We are strong, we challenge ourselves to be better, faster, stronger, to move forward and explore the unexplored, to learn more everyday and to understand ourselves  and this beautiful planet better than we did yesterday.

Can we overcome our differences?  Can we be strong despite our weaknesses? Can we work as one to achieve the greatness humanity has the potential for? I have hope that the answer is yes. As long as there are those risking it all to be the first  we have hope. 

Notes on raising a Brony

           The theme song is noxious, the colors are vibrant, and the voices sweet enough to give one cavities. Not my first choice in toons, My little Pony: Friendship is magic has taken over my house.  Contrary to popular belief it isn't even my daughter putting on this super cute cartoon, it's my 9 year old son!  At first I was simply glad the two of them were getting along and enjoying the same show, and then I heard John De Lancie.  In case you're not in the know Mr. De Lancie famously played "Q", a Star Trek villain of, well, god like supremacy.  In true form, the character of "Discord" would make  Q proud, stirring up , well, discord.  While this did little to alter my desire to watch the show it certainly elevated it in my geekpinion. 

          As homeschoolers,   issues of " girly" v . "boyish" things rarely come up even though my kids definitely display a lot of distinct traits true to the pre conceived notions of what one gender or another happens to find of interest. In our house my husband cooks and I love power tools, so we are pretty loosey goosy with the gender roles.  This is why I was surprised to find my son completely terrified that his friend might discover his love of the ponies.  Being not only a total fan girl, but also bisexual, supporting my kids in whatever they love is a deep passion for me, especially when it calls into question who they are "supposed" to be. So, what does a mom do when her son loves ponies but hides them under his pillow? Well, to the Interwebs went I!

        To say that I was surprised at what I found is an understatement.  Not only was my son not alone in his boyish love of the very girly ponies, there was even a name for his forbidden love; Brony.

Finding this legion of mostly grown men ( guys around 19-25), literally brought tears to my eyes. Not only did my son have zero reason to be embarrassed  ( a fact I knew, of course), but it would be possible for him, in some near future, to find other guys to share his love with.  There are so many of them they have their own convention, and their group is growing so much they sell Brony tees at the  ever trendy Hot Topics.

        Maybe he won't always love Rainbow Dash, but I am so glad to know that he is growing up in a world where Bronies exist!

        So often we worry about how little girls see the world, how their roles will be shaped by the notions of the media and the masses and we forget our little boys.  How are they affected by the pink aisles in the toy store, and by the deliberate separation of girl and boy toys?  My mission, as a mom and a lover of freedom and joy, is to make sure that my son is comfortable in his skin, that he can embrace all parts of himself without feelings of doubt or fear.  The fact that there are literally thousands of other guys out there leading the way warms my little heart cockles.  It is my greatest hope that things will keep on shifting and evolving until one day there is only one toy aisle, and its filled with rainbows and Legos. 

Making Friends and Rocking out

Being a younger mom can be a lonely land. Being an extremely geeky home school mom is a whole other level. For the first few years I tried like hell to fit in with the other moms, but in the end I realized I want my children to embrace themselves and to set that example I had to do the same thing. For me this means embracing my hobbies and geekness and living it up in cosplay heaven. Luckily I live in LA, which, when one searches, can provide no end of the strange and unusual. On a jont to one of my favorite geektastic establishments, one Whimsically in Hollyweird, I came across a card for an adult Harry Potter fan group. I checked it out online but most of the activities took place in the city and it just wasn't in the cards for me. Fast forward a year and I am at my first geek convention ( not counting Star Trek conventions and the Ren Faire) Comicazi. Checking out voice talent, comic artists and fellow geek cosplayers I came across the table of the same group, Los Angeles Dumbledore's Army. I met and chatted with three very cool people and felt more inspired to get into the group. Logging on to find the book club within the group was reading the same book I was currently reading I bite the bullet and joined up. Its never been terribly easy for me to find people who speak my language, but within an hour with just a portion of the group I had found more kindred spirits than I had in years of park days and play dates. Beach Party dueling and great social media conversations and I am in geek heaven. LADA turned out to be a group of some of the raddest people I have met. Every one filled with the love and friendship one would imagine on the Hogwarts express. Every new face friendly and open. And they don't just love the Potter, virtually any obscure reference I espouse will undoubtedly be met with at least one nod of understanding. So, last night, thanks to my wonderful husband who totally supports my geek habit, I joined my fellow Potter Geeks at the Troubadour  in Hollywood to rock out to some wizard rock and watch a puppet show. Don't hate, these puppets will have you rolling in your seats. Side note for Home school pride; I learned of the puppet pals years ago because the creator was home schooled.

Anyway, I donned my So Cali summer wizard garb, my husband his top hat, and we set off. Approaching the line I found a couple of very cool LADA members, and I was home. Being able to express ones self with abandon is truly a freeing experience, and finding others with which you can do so is even better. A few other people joined us in line and in no time I was inadvertently recruiting for the Army, and they were glad to be recruited! We took our seats, ordered our drinks, and chatted away in eager anticipation of the promised wizard awesomeness. I even saw a few other home schoolers hanging around, but the coolest was yet to come. As the minutes ticked by, the Troubedour filled ever so slowly, until the lights dimmed and looking down I saw the place was PACKED!! the red and gold for Gryffindor house was, of course, prominent.

There were graying old couples, finicky nursing toddlers and rawking Hufflepunks. I was touched, as lame as that may sound, by the sheer number of those in attendance. Everyone of us there because of a book. Ok, well, seven books. Everyone of us touched by the story of the boy who lived and those who loved him. In true form the Puppets of the Potter Puppet Pals delivered a fabulously funny show, to which many of the audience sang along. Then Harry and the Potters took the stage and rocked that place like a...something magical and rocking...leaving the crowd wanting more. The encore song, an epic ballad to our great and lost leader, Albus Dumbledore, nearly brought tears to my eyes as I was filled with the love in the room, the love that comes for a mutual understanding of what matters in this world, a shared love of life and of a book. A BOOK!! Do you have any idea how freaking awesome that is?!? For me, a girl who once found her friends solely in the pages of books, to find myself surrounded by literally hundreds of others who are like me. Well, lets just say when the songs came to an end and I bid my new friends good bye I was at once sorry to see them go and eager for the next time we would geek out to the extreme. J.K nailed it when she wrote of the importance of finding friends, friends who like you no matter how much of a dork you are, or better yet, those who will don cloaks and carry wands and play wizards right along side you, even if you're all proper grown ups.

L'chaim!

I tend to get pretty emotional this time of year. See, its nearly my daughters birthday, which in and of itself isn't much to get all choked up about, but for me there is so much more to it than that. My delivery was at once the most amazing and the most terrifying night of my life. I had succeeded in delivering my daughter in swift fashion without drugs, having cleverly absconded to the bathroom every time one of the drug pushing nurses came into the room, and was resting happily in the dark as this tiny new person suckled away as though she had been doing  it, well, all her life, that's when the scary part started.

Having been given an unnecessary dose of pitocin, I began to have contractions..again. Fast forward past the gross parts you really have to love me to hear, I was bleeding to death. I handed off my daughter to my terrified and exhausted husband and was rushed into the operating room. I had already lost a good part of my hearing and my vision was fading fast on the edges, I was going into shock and in the process of actually dying. It was like one of those horror movies where the heroine is strapped to a bed and surrounded by bright lights and doctors with masks in place of where noses and mouths belonged. I was prodded, poked, hooked up to bags of blood. Yes, I said bags, as in more than one. As in I had lost so much blood they had to give me double doses for the next three hours. In the end I am alive, obviously, and I had my daughter with me in recovery and was able to watch her sleep. She was such a trooper, they kept trying to give her a bottle, something I really didn't want her to have, and she just kept falling back asleep, already the adorably little sneak. My body was a wreck for at least two months, no one tells you how you're going to feel with someone else's blood in your veins and let me tell you, it ain't great. But, I was alive. Every time she woke me to nurse, I was alive. Every minute of lost sleep, I was ALIVE. In this country we take for granted the dangers posed by child birth ( not to mention inept hospital employees). Never in a million years would I have imagined I would find myself on the wrong end of a bag of donated blood, but there I was.

Every year, around this time, I get to thinking about what would have happened had I not been lucky enough to find myself in an American hospital, a point of fact I find ironic considering my overall opinion of the medical "industry" here. How many smiles I would have missed, how many hugs. What would life have been like for them; my husband and our children? My daughter is an amazing little being all her own, full of song and art and all the wonder one imagines a little girl should be, but to me she is the very personification of life. With every year she celebrates her birthday I, too, celebrate my life. On that night I was reborn. I was enlightened. Life is the briefest of things, the most precious of treasures. In her sparkling little brown eyes are all the potentials in life. In her dimples are the hopes of tomorrow. Excuse me as I wax poetic, but I really cant help it. This little person, a girl I had hoped would be a boy, has taught me so much with her very presence. She reminds me of all the wonder I had become too jaded to see, she reminds me that tea parties are great fun and that little girls may have a lot harder fight in this world but are every bit as great to raise as boys are.

So, happy birthday to my ninja princess surfer girl. You make my days bright and cheery and my life richer than I could have imagined.

Also, I'd like to get a little preachy...if you qualify and are able, please donate blood. The life you save could be mine.

Geek Pride

Geek Pride, like any other pride , is all about being, well, proud.  I was in the geek closet for a long time, I must admit, though many would tell you I never really shut the closet door. In school I was the nerd, the girl who sat in front of the class and knew all the answers. I was the only kid in my JR. High science club who cheered when the teacher ( the hot Mr. Gussin) put on Buckaroo Banzai, and knew half the lines. But it wasn't until high school that I really embraced. it. Fine, I thought to myself, call me a nerd, call me a geek; I freaking AM and I love it! Now geek is cool, geek is chic and that's okay too. It means little dorks like me will grow up proud of their love of Science AND science fiction.

 What does a geek look like, you ask. Well, some are in disguise as moms and dads, some as lawyers and doctors ( not THE doctor, to be clear), they are mechanics and check out girls, teachers and students ( especially the Jedi). How can one tell when one is near or speaking to a geek. Well, you can have built in geek-dar, like many of us, or you can pay close attention. Here is a list of possible signs you are dealing with a geek and not a nerd or a dweeb ( nerds and dweebs, while highly intelligent,  normally lack imagination and character; they are not geeks)

1. Obscure references. These may be references of popular fandoms; i.e comments about Yoda, Spock, The Dr., a towel, or He -who-must-not-be-named. Extreme geeks will reference things of  which you have never heard nor have any hope recognizing, these are the best kind of geeks
2. Fan attire- comics tees, movie tees, periodic table of elements, dragons, etc. More subtle geek attire may be donned, but you're going to have to really know your stuff to spot these geeks, they have likely been in hiding for years and now how to blend with the normals.
3. Snort laughing. pretty obvious
4. Most of them are smarter than you. Many of us geeks are highly intelligent and know it. They called me Miss know it all; now my one goal in life is to know it ALL.
5. You're in a comic shop, fan convention, the lego section of Target and you see an adult...this adult is a geek. Hug them.
6. No more pocket protectors; the modern geek has a phone that may as well be a tricorder; she/he will google any question she/he does'nt already know the answer to and school you like a boss ( or spock, as it were).

In closing; GEEKS RULE!!! Be proud of your brain! If you are a geek still in the closet because you were teased as a kid let me tell you, it does get better. Find a group of fellow geeks into your favorite fandom, hit up a convention, hang out at the comics shop. You're not weird, you're cool beyond the comprehension of the normals, and we love you.
p.s. Check out this RAD video, it is my current life theme song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFhgupR565Q

Comics, Movies and the NEW princess paradigm

It is a popular theme in feminist literature to rag on the Disney princesses. Recently a new acquaintance mentioned the fact that in all the new princess merch. none of the princesses are looking at each other...well, of course they aren't, they are posing for a picture, they are looking at the "camera". Sure, Disney princess are super girly and totally add mass amounts of fluff to stories that once taught little girls the dangers of going into the woods alone, but lets look at some good points.

 I'll start with Ariel, since she was really the first of the new princesses. Yes, they totally ruined the original story, but Ariel is a tough little fish chick. At this point Disney was only beginning to scratch the surface of what it is little girls really want to be. They don't want to be told what to do, where to go, or who to love. Then there is Belle.  First, she loves to read. What a great example for little girls. To me it says " look, its beautiful to be smart." Next, she shuns the pretty boy and falls for a big, hairy monster because love is not about what one looks like but rather ones inner being and potential. Yes, he saves her, but doesn't she save him too? Moving on we have Jasmine. She is strong willed and, despite living in a culture where her father would choose her husband she rebels and proves herself to be fully capable of handling herself ( except when pitted against an evil wizard, but who among us can say she wouldn't have some issues here aswell). Pocahontas saves John Smith and stands up for peace between her people and the white man     (yes, please don't even get me started on fact v. fiction here, we're talking about princesses hot history)and , in fact, Disney here creates a stronger female character than the real person Pocahontas was.  Mulan (who was never a princess but always finds herself mixed in with them) cuts her hair, learns to fight and ultimately saves all the tough dudes in China. Tiana, a hard working girl from the "wrong" side of town, saves a prince with no desire what ever to marry him. In fact, she does it all for her friend! Yay! Rapunzel knocks out a would be attacker ( so she thinks) with a frying pan and despite having been sheltered in the worst possible way, makes her way in the big scary world. Disneys newest princess, Merida, a fiery red haired archer with a desire for adventure sets off alone to tackle the world. Perhaps the problem is the idea that because a princess is pretty that gives little girls the desire to be pretty, but doesn't nature do that anyway? Is it not a natural instinct to desire to be attractive to draw a mate? And yes, some of the princesses do reflect a more subdued female role...but they were written in the 40's and 50's and are based on stories written in the 1500's, how can we compare what we are seeing now with ideals that have long since changed. Clumping the new wave of characters in with those first few damsels in distress is simple folly.  Disney is not alone in recognizing the importance of stronger female roll models for little woman. The new Mirror, Mirror has our damsel, Snow white, taking on a fearsome beast all on her lonesome...and totally kicking ass! Fiona, another tough princess turned Ogre, showing not only do you not have to be quiet and obedient, but you don't even have to be pretty to find love and to be admirable. Kim Possible, Kitara, Toph, Rogue, Storm, Batwoman, Wonder Woman, and lets not forget one of the most kick ass princesses, Leia!

 Yes, there are numerous portrayals of weak, pretty girls who are saved by strong men, but so too are there those types of woman in the world. There has been a shift. Woman writers, producers and comic book artists are on the scene in force shaking up the Princess Paradigm and turning the tides in the giant web we call the Media.

 Check out the very witty new comic PrinceLess, which not only tackles the pretty princess ideas, but also what boys get from the stories. We always forget the boys in these conversations. What do they get from these characters. I can tell you, at least among the guys I know, they want the tough chicks, the brave ones, the sassy ones. Yes, they like pretty, but that can only go so far. This new shift lets the boys discover that woman can be so much more than pretty and girls see that when they are woman they can be just as kick ass in a ball gown as in a pair of jeans.
Ragging on Disney for putting pretty girls in dresses is wasted energy. I, myself, am a pretty kick ass chick and I freaking love pretty dresses. I love my bow, my dremel and my needle and thread too. With the media full of reports on "the war on woman" we all need to see that, though on Capital hill, there is a battle going on, the mass media directed at the next generation has opened its eyes and is giving girls what they need, images of girls like them being more, doing more, and standing up for themselves. Here's to a generation of totally awesome, intelligent, kick ass beauties taking over the world.

Dragons and Butterflies

Once upon a time, when the thought of children was a far off fantasy, I dreamed of little boys ( in a totally innocent, non creepy way). I grew up in a house where my mom and I were outnumbered and I always found it easier to get along with boys because girls were always dressing up like brides and talking about boys. I was more often breaking out my STNG action figures or playing Ninja turtles with my brothers. Also, girls never got  the geek references I was using even then. In high school I had the same problem forming lasting friendships with girls, so when the ultra sound tech told us we were having a girl my first reaction was " oh well." All around me my few female friends, and even some of my male friends, were going bonkers because I was having a girl, but I was not impressed. Yes, I'll admit, little girls cloths are cute and all, but what does a geeky tomboy know about raising a girl?! Fast forward five( nearly six) years. I am beyond happy to have my little Han in my life. She is every bit the action adventure girl I was, while ever reminding me that I am a GRRRL. But there is another side to raising a daughter. My son will have little issue in the world, being a handsome white male with a great big brain. I will raise him to be respectful of others and from his Dad he is already learning how to treat woman kindly and honestly. I would love to think it would be exactly the same for my little girl, but even here, in the good old US of A, woman are not equal to men. She will meet assholes, perverts, and dick heads, but that's not even the worst of it. One of the biggest reasons I have had trouble really enjoying the company of other woman is the innate desire to compete. As girls we are inundated with ideas of the prettiest girl being the best, and even though I have tried to provide a balanced view to my own daughter she still has picked up on these ideas.

" Lets play a beauty contest to see who's prettier" WHAT!?! I'm with Mrs. Obama on this one, we are all pretty. We are all on the same team. In a world that pits woman against woman the truth is we, as a sex, are globally under rated. Already she is faced with people only commenting her beauty. Everywhere we go  she hears it " oh you're so pretty" " you should be in commercials" "wont she be a heart breaker." I fucking hope not. What kind of thing is it to wish on a beautiful person that they should hurt those that might love them? So how does one combat the stream of pretty princesses and digitally remastered magazine covers? We go climb rocks, that's how, and dig in the mud and paint our faces with war paint and find our inner Amazon. My daughter will be a tall, beautiful woman with a smile that will stop hearts, but it is far more important that she will be kind, caring, intelligent, understanding, adventurous and BRAVE! We must raise our daughters to be woman and not pretty girls, to stand by their fellow woman and becoming stronger for it. Will I be able to fight the onslaught of hormonally induced self loathing that is inevitable when she approaches puberty, maybe not, but when she comes out the other end it is my greatest hope that she will look into the mirror everyday and see an intelligent, strong woman who happens to be very pretty and not a pretty girl who is intelligent and strong. Also that she knows that its still ok to put on a princess dress and a tiara, its just more fun to don armor and chase dragons.

Yesterday my little girl was playing in a magical world with an old Halloween cauldron when I said what very few parents must; Don't stir your cauldron with your wand, you'll ruin the phoenix feather inside.
Along with " don't hit your sister with a light saber" I am often uttering parental advice that has little resemblance to what " normal" people ( Lets call them Normals) say to their own kids. But its paying off, let me tell you about my geektastic mothers days. First, an early morning jont with just the husband and I to see the latest in comic book movies; The Avengers. Sporting my cool new hand made necklaces ( The one from my daughter has a Yin Yang on it " like the balance in Avatar, mommy" and the one from my son a beautiful clear locket " it looked like a remembrall Mom" ) I was glad to see the theater full of other nerdy moms and their equally geeky kids. We all laughed and cried and hooted as the armor  clad heroes kicked space ass. 

Back at home a lazy day of X-men cartoons, a little spell casting on Pottermore and the perusal of my new stack of comics ( everyone should totally read the new 52 Batwoman, the art is stunning and it has a great story line...plus batwoman is a lesbian and she is totally HOT). On request a cake was made for me to decorate by husband and daughter, and I decorated it with classic yellow and the bat symbol. Finishing the blissful day with the latest episode of Legends of Korra, I must say I live the charmed geek life. hope all you moms out there had a great day too!

Top Five Favorite geekdoms, in no particular order, and why I love them

11)      Star Wars. This will always, no matter what George Lucas does to it,  be one of my favorite geek epics. The story transcends the genre; an epic adventure of the under dogs over coming galactic sized odd s to free the people from tyranny. A fight for what is right against what is wrong. And Ewoks.  As an adult I have read a LOT about the ideas behind the story and found that, though I did not know anything about “the hero with a thousand faces” at eight years old, the epic tale touched me on a deeper level even then. Plus; Han Solo and light sabers are totally rad.

22)      Lord of the Rings. For years I said that nothing could come close to my love of Star wars. I had read the books and seen the 80’s cartoons and wasn’t expecting much more than a fantasy flick when I went to see The Fellowship in the theater. I was moved. Firstly, Peter Jackson had taken the long winded story of Tolkien and made it real, bringing to life one of the most visually stunning worlds of fantasy I have ever seen. Keeping to true to real film making (Take note Lucas) he used models and camera tricks instead of giving into the computer world. The story was edited in the perfect way, peeling away all the extras Tolkien felt necessary, and giving us a true film.  Wonderful casting, gorgeous settings and Andy Serkis together make Lord of the Rings one of the best trilogies of all time.

33)      Nightmare before Christmas…( also anything Tim Burton touches)

The music, the world, and the story all speak to some weird girl part of me that still lurks in corners with her hair dyed black knowing no one gets her. Well, jack gets her. A friend makes fun when I say I love jack, but to hear his mournful cry for some lost part of himself brings a tear every single time. Also, for those of us who enjoy the secular, pagan aspects of the December holiday, Burton and his team brought new meaning to X-Mas, giving us a new holiday to celebrate from October to December.

44)      Harry Potter.  Some of you may know my Maiden names happens to be Potter, and so, in an ongoing effort to be nothing like the masses ( Pretty sure I’m losing) I refused to read the books, though I did get them for my brother since they were really written for his age group ( he would be that same age as harry). I saw the first movie and found it cute; typical kid movie with a neat wizard idea. And then my son was born and I was stuck in a chair nursing for hours. “I need a book,” I told my husband “a long one” And so he brought me the newly released fifth book of the series, The Order of the Phoenix. As an avid reader I normally wouldn’t start a book series in the middle, but at the time I didn’t care too much about being caught up…until Sirius fell behind the curtain. I needed more. I stole back the books I had given my little brother and dove in. Since then I can’t get enough Potter. I have read the entire series at least twice (some of the books three or four times); I have a cloak of my own and have knitted many a Gryffindor scarf for those I love.  J.K created a story for children that became a story for everyone.  Her skill grows as the characters do, and as we learn about the Deathly Hallows our hearts are full of a fine mix of hope and dread for the characters we grow to love. The movies have been done in a way to allow everyone to love Potter, and though I like them it is the books I LOVE!

55)      Books. That’s right, all of them. It is a rare day when I come across a book I won’t finish. Heck, I even read the Twilight series (she says, hanging her head in shame).

When I was very young, going through the grind that is elementary school, I was a late reader. Really late. So late they put me in special class with the kid who eats buggers and occasionally wets himself.  They gave me test after test, kept telling me I was smart and asking why I didn’t get it. Turns out my brain isn’t like everyone else’s, I am dyslexic. It was a fight, at times I wanted to give up; who cares about reading anyway. Then a teacher, one of the four or so I had throughout my whole school experience that actually seemed to care about my future, told me I would make a great writer ( mostly because I was a big liar on show and tell days). So I fought on, and then, one day on the freeway, I read a sign. All on my own.  From that day on I read everything I could get my grubby mitts on.  Books became my best friends; they didn’t care that I wasn’t as rich as some of the other kids, or that I was a little weird. In fact, in the pages of books I found that most of the heroes ARE the weirdoes!  And so it was that I embraced my weirdness and made my lifelong goal becoming a writer, to tell stories to the weirdoes without friends; without hope.

 And here you are, reading my words. Success?

So, if you’ve read something good, let me know.

Top Five reasons Han is hotter than Luke

Top Five reasons Han is hotter than Luke

1 1)      No whining. Poor little Luke can’t go play with his friends, boohoo. Jabba sends Griedo to kill Han, he just blast that mother fucker like a boss.

2 2)      Wookie side kick. You can tell a lot about a man by the friends he keeps. A member of the noble Wookie race follows Han without question. What kind of man garners such respect, a bad ass hotty that’s who. Luke has droid slaves and an old nurse maid (No offense Master Kenobi) Not sexy

3 3)      Scruffy looking. He cleans up well, but it better be for a medal, Han's bad ass sexiness is evident in his ne'er–do–well smuggler style.  Luke looks like a pedophiles wet dream.

4 4)      The Falcon. Let’s face it; Batman was at least half right. Chicks dig a sweet ride and a guy who can control it at high speeds.

5 5)      He’s a smart ass. Luke is so serious about EVERYTHING; Han can have a laugh in the middle of a space battle.

I’m sure the list is longer than this. For me there is always the additional reason that Luke, at least when I was a kid, reminded me of one of my own brothers while Han was a full grown man. 

So, Ladies ( and Gents), Do share. Who do YOU think is hotter?