I didn't want to do it. What kind of mother would I be if I let my daughter willingly take on the ultimate hair challenge, the partially shaved head, at the tender age of 8.
I remember those awful months, when I tried to grow out the classic bad ass under shave so popular in the 90's. I don't regret my decision at all, of course, but remember those months of the uneven hair, not willing to cut it all to even it out, but she was adamant. She wanted her hair shaved. Her inspiration, yet another reason for my resisting the idea, Avril Lavign.
The more she asked for it, the more I resisted. But with every adorable miming of the act, after having been asked to please stop freaking asking, I started to wonder why I was saying no.
Was it just because I don't like Avril lavign, because that would be stupid. Was it because I thought she was too young to shave her head? No, her brother was offered a mohawk at 7. And then it hit me. It was, at least in some part of my brain, because she was a SHE!
We are all guilty of it, however subtly. Even me, a woman who has shaved her entire head for the hell of it, who has pierced her tongue because why the hell not? Yup. Even me. As far as reasons go, it wasn't good enough. So
Of course, I was and am still worried about the day when she tires of the style and decides to grow it out, but that's a lesson in consequences, I guess.
Here's why I said yes and, as friend and mother,after a half hour conversation about the consequences of a shaved head, took those clipper in hand.
I remember the feeling I had when I shaved my head. It was a feeling of freedom. Of being equal. And I don't want my daughter to ever NOT feel equal. I never want to say to her " No, you cant do that because you're a girl". So we shaved her head.
 |
| an outfit of her own design. |
And she freaking loves it.
Then last night I realized another reason I did it. Being a proud momma, and I am proud of her, she is so brave, so fearless, I wanted to share her bravery with friends.
As a mom I have a wide variety of friends and some are of another school of thought. There response was one of judgment, " She'll regret that when people say things about it, she'll be bullied" " But she's a little girl"
My kids are lucky. Since we homeschool we spend most of our time with open minded, accepting people. People who appreciate a child's time to experiment with life, and with their hair. They don't really have to worry about being bullied.
I want my children to open minded, to be accepting, and be be comfortable in their own skin regardless of what other people think about it. A wise man, Simon Pegg to be exact, once said " Being a geek is all about being honest about what you enjoy and not being afraid to demonstrate that affection". I want to live in a world where people don't have to worry that their hair style will get them bullied, or where people would wish that on them to teach them some lesson in fitting in. So I am glad I shaved her head for her, and I hope she is never afraid to be who she is.
